A Different Kind of Lost Love

I've made a huge mistake, and I've lost my best friend as a result. I don't blame her for not being around me and to not trust me when I can't even trust myself. I love her and never meant to hurt her, and that's exactly what I've done. And like I did when I lost my last love, I've buried the pain; she left Bloomington to get away. I can't do anything to change the situation, I'm just going to give her some space and pray that someday she and everyone around me can trust me again. I'm lost and alone. So what do I do, I think that I'm going to try and go to church and find some answers. And get back on the path that I used to be on, the one that made sense.

As for the other thing I just did tonight, I don't know. But right now, I'm not hurting anyone by keeping it between me and my conscience. I'm not ready to start anything, so I'm not...but it felt so good "like my own personal brand of heroin"