Which way is up?

Going with my unhealthy interest in Alice in Wonderland, I've been finding myself questioning what side of the Looking Glass I've gone on. Though now that I can call myself a functioning human, no longer curling up in a ball and crying about my ex. I find myself in situations that I'm not familiar with, dating being the biggest one. I'm happy....ish. Happiness is not something that I have allowed myself to have in a long time, and here I am.
But back to my issues with the Looking Glass, I question what side I'm currently in...the real world or Wonderland? Is what I see the world that is really out there or is it a reflection of what I want to be out there? I mean it's not ever night I find myself making out with a total stranger after a night at the bar....I don't want that to be me...that's not me. Of course then again I need to find out who the heck I am anymore, the person I though was me was destroyed in the break-up. That girl is dead, and I've found that I'm more of an empty frame...empty and lonely. And what I can only describe as an emo hippie.
Yes it's true I have amazing friends, and wouldn't trade them for anything, but it's been brought to my attention that I really am alone; no one to come home to, no one to watch TV in bed with, no one to ask me how my day was. I think I need to find two grand, then I can buy a dog.
I'm also tired of my friends judging me for "drinking too much". They mean well, I'm sure but they really don't understand how little I actually go drinking. I tend to binge when I do drink and that's were the funny stories come from, but the fact that they believe that my life is controlled by the bottle is ridiculous. I'm not some train wreck, and drinking because I can't deal with not having my ex in my life.
OK OK...Peace out, I've got a date to finish getting ready for!